Fatwa: # 14602
Category: Marriage
Country: South Africa
Date: 4th October 2006

Title

i have a reallly big problm ... i am married for the last 4 years we have no kids as yet cause my husband say he is not ready ... i really do want kids .

Question

aslm

i have a reallly big problm ... i am married for the last 4 years we have no kids as yet cause my husband say he is not ready ... i really do want kids . we are are intemit my husband never comes inside me he always withdraws,or if he does he wheres a comdom,what is my right as a wife about this?

the next problem is ,because of the above i find myselg going towards other men,really shamfully i commited adultry,i am reallllllllllly sorry about this i cant seem to live with my self.my husband does not know.i as well finf myself addicted to porn.may allah save me

please i reallly need help.

you sanaa

Answer

Assalamu Alaikum Warahmatullah

 

Brother/Sister in Islam

 

Allah has given you the courage to discuss this issue and seek guidance. This is the true spirit of Deen and Islam. You are conscious of Deen and the guilt of your action has brought you this far. Your sincerity will take you a long way Inshallah. According to Shariah, your husband cannot wear a condom or withdraw without your consent. If he does, he is violating your rights of being fulfilled during intercourse. You should discuss the issue with your husband openly. There is no need to divulge your sin to him. Both of you could agree for you to take oral contraceptives instead of your husband using condoms or withdrawing. This should be agreeable to your husband as he does not want to have children and it will also serve to grant you fulfillment from his side. This ruling is based on the principle of lesser of the two evils. It is not correct to unnecessarily practice birth control, but the sin of adultery etc is worse. You should also make Tawba to Allah and do not resort to anything un Islamic. Allah is Rahman & Rahim, he is most forgiving. Do not despair; turn to him for forgiveness & solutions for your problems.

 

 

 

And Allah Knows Best

 

Mufti Ebrahim Desai

 

 

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