Fatwa: # 45800
Category: Jurisprudence and Rulings...
Country:
Date: 1st August 2020

Title

Marriage issues

Question

Assalam walekum I have done a hidden marriage from my parents. I live with my parents and its been 2 years since my nikkah. This is my first marriage and my husbands 2nd marriage. He has 2 kids. I got pregnant and her forcefully aborted my baby. I am very heart broken. It was not my choice at all. I want to know does he have to pay blood money to me as i heard this and how much? And how can he be forgived by Allah by doing this. It was a pure halal baby. 

 Also he has given me 2 divorces already and has done riju both times. I understand 1 is left. I once told him i will tell my parents i married him and he said our condition was that i cant tell and he will tell himself. And he said if i tell then he will divorce me. So if i telll my parents about my marriage will 3rd divorce take place? How do i get my right as a wife from him. He does not treat me well. Sometimes even slaps me. He aborted mybaby and i feel thats the main part that he did not give me my right as a wife.

Please guide me 

Jazzak Allah

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Sister in Islam,

We are sad to note the contents of your email. May Allah grant you courage to overcome this challenge and guide you that which is best for you. Aameen.

You refer to three issues:

1)    Blood money for abortion of child

2)    The forgiveness of Allah

3)    Your rights as a wife

Sister, you state you are staying with your parents and secretly married. If you would have consulted your parents on your marriage issue, you would not have been going through such misery. You are suffering the consequences of hiding information from your parents. Parents play a very important role in the support and security of their daughter in her marriage. Your husband is aware that you do not have that security and protection. He took advantage of you and then had the liberty to abort the child. He divorced you two times. Despite all that, he threatens to issue you the third divorce if you inform your parents.

Sister, you made a mistake by not informing your parents. You see the consequences of that now. You are on edge due to parents non-support. There is no need for you to live like this. You should inform your parents of your mistake. They will be upset. However, their love for you will prevail and assist you out of love.

Your husbands love is artificial or superficial. Do not give preference to such love over the real love for your parents. Have the courage and correct the wrongs and lead a peaceful life with dignity and honour.[i][ii]

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Mahmood Suliman

Student Darul Iftaa
Gaborone, Botswana

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

 

 

 

 

 

 


[i] الدر المختار وحاشية ابن عابدين (رد المحتار) (3/ 176)

(قَوْلُهُ وَقَالُوا إلَخْ) قَالَ فِي النَّهْرِ: بَقِيَ هَلْ يُبَاحُ الْإِسْقَاطُ بَعْدَ الْحَمْلِ؟ نَعَمْ يُبَاحُ مَا لَمْ يَتَخَلَّقْ مِنْهُ شَيْءٌ وَلَنْ يَكُونَ ذَلِكَ إلَّا بَعْدَ مِائَةٍ وَعِشْرِينَ يَوْمًا، وَهَذَا يَقْتَضِي أَنَّهُمْ أَرَادُوا بِالتَّخْلِيقِ نَفْخَ الرُّوحِ وَإِلَّا فَهُوَ غَلَطٌ لِأَنَّ التَّخْلِيقَ يَتَحَقَّقُ بِالْمُشَاهَدَةِ قَبْلَ هَذِهِ الْمُدَّةِ كَذَا فِي الْفَتْحِ، وَإِطْلَاقُهُمْ يُفِيدُ عَدَمَ تَوَقُّفِ جَوَازِ إسْقَاطِهَا قَبْلَ الْمُدَّةِ الْمَذْكُورَةِ عَلَى إذْنِ الزَّوْجِ. وَفِي كَرَاهَةِ الْخَانِيَّةِ: وَلَا أَقُولُ بِالْحِلِّ إذْ الْمُحْرِمُ لَوْ كَسَرَ بَيْضَ الصَّيْدِ ضَمِنَهُ لِأَنَّهُ أَصْلُ الصَّيْدِ فَلَمَّا كَانَ يُؤَاخَذُ بِالْجَزَاءِ فَلَا أَقَلَّ مِنْ أَنْ يَلْحَقَهَا إثْمٌ هُنَا إذَا سَقَطَ بِغَيْرِ عُذْرِهَا اهـ قَالَ ابْنُ وَهْبَانَ: وَمِنْ الْأَعْذَارِ أَنْ يَنْقَطِعَ لَبَنُهَا بَعْدَ ظُهُورِ الْحَمْلِ وَلَيْسَ لِأَبِي الصَّبِيِّ مَا يَسْتَأْجِرُ بِهِ الظِّئْرَ وَيَخَافُ هَلَاكَهُ. وَنُقِلَ عَنْ الذَّخِيرَةِ لَوْ أَرَادَتْ الْإِلْقَاءَ قَبْلَ مُضِيِّ زَمَنٍ يُنْفَخُ فِيهِ الرُّوحُ هَلْ يُبَاحُ لَهَا ذَلِكَ أَمْ لَا؟ اخْتَلَفُوا فِيهِ، وَكَانَ الْفَقِيهُ عَلِيُّ بْنُ مُوسَى يَقُولُ: إنَّهُ يُكْرَهُ، فَإِنَّ الْمَاءَ بَعْدَمَا وَقَعَ فِي الرَّحِمِ مَآلُهُ الْحَيَاةُ فَيَكُونُ لَهُ حُكْمُ الْحَيَاةِ كَمَا فِي بَيْضَةِ صَيْدِ الْحَرَمِ، وَنَحْوُهُ فِي الظَّهِيرِيَّةِ قَالَ ابْنُ وَهْبَانَ: فَإِبَاحَةُ الْإِسْقَاطِ مَحْمُولَةٌ عَلَى حَالَةِ الْعُذْرِ، أَوْ أَنَّهَا لَا تَأْثَمُ إثْمَ الْقَتْلِ اهـ. وَبِمَا فِي الذَّخِيرَةِ تَبَيَّنَ أَنَّهُمْ مَا أَرَادُوا بِالتَّحْقِيقِ إلَّا نَفْخُ الرُّوحِ، وَأَنَّ قَاضِيَ خَانْ مَسْبُوقٌ بِمَا مَرَّ مِنْ التَّفَقُّهِ، وَاَللَّهُ تَعَالَى الْمُوَفِّقُ اهـ كَلَامُ النَّهْرِ

الدر المختار وحاشية ابن عابدين (رد المحتار) (6/ 429)

(قَوْلُهُ وَيُكْرَهُ إلَخْ) أَيْ مُطْلَقًا قَبْلَ التَّصَوُّرِ وَبَعْدَهُ عَلَى مَا اخْتَارَهُ فِي الْخَانِيَّةِ كَمَا قَدَّمْنَاهُ قُبَيْلَ الِاسْتِبْرَاءِ وَقَالَ إلَّا أَنَّهَا لَا تَأْثَمُ إثْمَ الْقَتْلِ (قَوْلُهُ وَجَازَ لِعُذْرٍ) كَالْمُرْضِعَةِ إذَا ظَهَرَ بِهَا الْحَبَلُ وَانْقَطَعَ لَبَنُهَا وَلَيْسَ لِأَبِي الصَّبِيِّ مَا يَسْتَأْجِرُ بِهِ الظِّئْرَ وَيَخَافُ هَلَاكَ الْوَلَدِ قَالُوا يُبَاحُ لَهَا أَنْ تُعَالِجَ فِي اسْتِنْزَالِ الدَّمِ مَا دَامَ الْحَمْلُ مُضْغَةً أَوْ عَلَقَةً وَلَمْ يُخْلَقْ لَهُ عُضْوٌ وَقَدَّرُوا تِلْكَ الْمُدَّةَ بِمِائَةٍ وَعِشْرِينَ يَوْمًا، وَجَازَ لِأَنَّهُ لَيْسَ بِآدَمِيٍّ وَفِيهِ صِيَانَةُ الْآدَمِيِّ خَانِيَّةٌ

فتاوي قاضي خان (٣١٢/٣)    

ان لم يستبن شيء من خلقه لا تأثم قال (رضي الله عنه) ولا أقول به فان المحرم اذا كسر بيض الصيد يكون ضامنا لأنه اصل الصيد فلما كان مؤاخذا بالجزاء ثمة فلا اقل من ان يلحقها اثم ههنا اذا اسقطت من غير عذر الا انها لا تأثم اثم القتل

كتاب النوازل (٢٦٥- ٢٦٨/١٦)   

امداد الفتاوى ( ٤/ ٢٠٢ - ٢٠٥ ) 

أحسن الفتاوى ( ٨/ ٣٤٧ – ٣٤٨) 

 

[ii] الهداية في شرح بداية المبتدي (1/ 244)

" وإذا أضافه إلى شرط وقع عقيب الشرط مثل أن يقول لامرأته إن دخلت الدار فأنت طالق " وهذا بالاتفاق لأن الملك قائم في الحال والظاهر بقاؤه إلى وقت وجود الشرط فيصح يمينا أو إيقاعا " ولا تصح إضافة الطلاق إلا أن يكون الحالف مالكا أو يضيفه إلى ملك " لأن الجزاء لا بد أن يكون ظاهرا ليكون مخيفا فيتحقق معنى اليمين وهو القوة والظهور بأحد هذين والإضافة إلى سبب الملك بمنزلة الإضافة إليه لأنه ظاهر عند سببه " فإن قال لأجنبية إن دخلت الدار فأنت طالق ثم تزوجها فدخلت الدار لم تطلق " لأن الحالف ليس بمالك ولا أضافه إلى الملك أو سببه ولا بد من واحد منهما.

 

مختصر القدوري (ص: 156)

وإن أضافه إلى شرط وقع عقب الشرط مثل أن يقول لامرأته: إن دخلت الدار فأنت طالق

 

DISCLAIMER - AskImam.org questions
AskImam.org answers issues pertaining to Shar'ah. Thereafter, these questions and answers are placed for public view on www.askimam.org for educational purposes. However, many of these answers are unique to a particular scenario and cannot be taken as a basis to establish a ruling in another situation or another environment. Askimam.org bears no responsibility with regards to these questions being used out of their intended context.
  • The Shar's ruling herein given is based specifically on the question posed and should be read in conjunction with the question.
  • AskImam.org bears no responsibility to any party who may or may not act on this answer and is being hereby exempted from loss or damage howsoever caused.
  • This answer may not be used as evidence in any Court of Law without prior written consent of AskImam.org.
  • Any or all links provided in our emails, answers and articles are restricted to the specific material being cited. Such referencing should not be taken as an endorsement of other contents of that website.
The Messenger of Allah said, "When Allah wishes good for someone, He bestows upon him the understanding of Deen."
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim]