Fatwa: # 43137
Category: Character, Morals (Akhlaaq)
Country:
Date: 19th January 2020

Title

What should I do if my parents apposed my marriage ?

Question

I got married a girl who had previously married without her parents consent as she escaped from house with her first husband and after she divorced her husband because her husband forced to marry her. After I fall in love with girl(at present my wife) without any bad act but I married her without my parents and family consent but her family consent from local registry marriage office.My mother and dad don't agree to accept her as she had previous marriage and bad record. They are saying they will not accept if they die and saying to marry another new girl who is also good girl as far as I know. If I don't marry the new girl, they(parents) will curse me always says to others family members. They are crying with me to marry the new girl. My question is What can I do ... Do I have to divorce her for my parents and do I have to marry the new girl. The thing is that our marriage life 8 years and we live together and as far as I know her character is good. When I got married, I was 23 now 29 and my wife is now 26. She is pious and always pray after married with me. She is waiting for me 8 years with good character.

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Brother in Islam ,

We have read your email and understand your situation. We make Dua Allah Taa'la ease your situation and grant you a prosperous marriage. Ameen

Brother, if you are happily married  and your wife is dedicated to the marriage, then there is no reason to divorce her. You should discuss the issue with a person who has influence over your parents and make them accept your marriage. The person should explain to your parents that divorce is abhorred in Islam.

Furthermore, it will be unfair and unjust to both of you to be divorced. There will be negative consequences on both and that will constitute oppression which is a major sin.

Allah Taa'la says :

[ [المائدة: 2  "وَلَا تَعَاوَنُوا عَلَى الْإِثْمِ وَالْعُدْوَانِ"

Translation: "And do not assist each other in sin and transgression"(Surah al-Maaidah, Verse 2)

If they insist on divorce, they will be part of the oppression and assisting in sin, which will be detrimental to their Iman and hereafter.

See the following Ahadeeth : 

عن أبي ذر، عن النبي صلى الله عليه وسلم، فيما روى عن الله تبارك وتعالى أنه قال: "يا عبادي إني حرمت الظلم على نفسي، وجعلته بينكم محرما، فلا تظالموا"

Translation : Abu Dharr reported that: Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said : "Allah the Exalted said: O my servants, I have forbidden oppression for myself and I have made it forbidden among you, so do not oppress one another"(Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2577)

عن جابر بن عبد الله، أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم، قال:" اتقوا الظلم، فإن الظلم ظلمات يوم القيامة"

Translation : Jabir Ibn Abdullah reported that : Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said : "Beware of committing oppression, for oppression will be darkness on the day of resurrection".(Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2578)

 

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Ahmad Patel

Student Darul Iftaa

South Africa

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.


[1] سورة الإسراء آية ٢٣

 

[2] سورة لقمان آية ١٥

 

 [3]ولا يرفع الولد صوته فوق صوت والديه ولا يجهر بهما بالكلام ولا يحد النظر إليهما ولا يمشي أمامها ولا يدعوهما بإسمهما ويتعلق ويتواضع لهما ولا يفوض أمر خدمتهما إلى غيره بل يخدمهما بنفسه ويطيعهما فيما أباحه الشرع وإن كانا كافرين ولا يدع خدمتهما لطلب علم زائد على فرض عين...ويعظم والديه فلا يؤم أباه وإن كان أفقه منه ويكرم أصدقائهما ويصلي أرحامهما ويزورهما كل جمعة وإن لم يكن عندهما بسلام وتحية وهدية وينفذ عهودهما ووصيتهما بعد موتهما ويزور قبرهما بدعاء واستغفار وقراءة وصدقة وغير ذلك من البر والخير قال عليه السلام من زار قبر أبويه في كل جمعة كتب برا

الكراهية للأسروشني (ق١٦/ب) مخطوط - الأزهرية

 

 [4]وعلى الوالدين أن لا يحملا الولد على العقوق بسوء المعاملة والجفاء بل يعينانه على البر

الكراهية للأسروشني (ق١٧/ا) مخطوط - الأزهرية

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