Fatwa: # 41412
Category: Psychological and Social
Country: Netherlands
Date: 21st November 2018


I am involved in a haram relationship, how can I terminate it?


Assalamu aleykum,

I have a question.

This summer I met a guy on vacation and we have been talking ever since trough social media (may Allah swt forgive me). He is a really nice boy and that's why we kept talking. We both agreed to not get into a marriage yet because i am still at school and we are both to young to get married. But lately i've been wanting to stop this because i know it's haram and I don't want to disobey Allah swt anymore. The only problem is that he already sees a future with me and because he is so nice and soft I don't want to break his heart or ruin him with this. Btw I have asked Allah swt a lot to help me but it feels like those dua's have been rejected. I hope you can give me advice on how to stop this relationship or what dua's i should do? 

May Allah reward you for you're time and effort and may Allah grant you Jannah In Sha Allah.



In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, The Most Merciful.

As-salaamu `alaykum wa-ramatullahi wa-barakatuh.

Sister in Islam,

At the outset, you should understand that a haram act always has negative consequences. It is haram for you to be in contact with the boy. Both of you are feeding each other’s desires and emotions with haram. You state the boy is nice. What is your criteria of nice? One cannot judge the niceness of a person just through a haram contact. The reaction of a haram contact is artificial and superficial. It is not true. Do not be duped by such an artificial conduct. Many young girls get caught up in such superficial relationships and are merely used and dumped. Later on this has devastating consequences of grief, anxiety and depression. Maintain your respect, dignity and honour and severe the haram relationship. The boy should be advised that the relationship is haram and you wish to stay away from haram. In this conduct, the boy will have respect for you.

You should consider putting the love of Allah above the feelings of the boy. Allah is our Creator. He deserves obedience. How can you give preference to the feelings of the boy and disobey Allah?

Do you love the boy more than Allah! If the boy wishes to marry you, he will propose for you. Your conduct will also serve to teach him a lesson to abstain from haram.

And Allah Ta`ala Knows Best.

Hussein Muhammad.

Student Darul Iftaa

Arusha, Tanzania

Checked and Approved by:

Mufti Ebrahim Desai.



DISCLAIMER - AskImam.org questions
AskImam.org answers issues pertaining to Shar'ah. Thereafter, these questions and answers are placed for public view on www.askimam.org for educational purposes. However, many of these answers are unique to a particular scenario and cannot be taken as a basis to establish a ruling in another situation or another environment. Askimam.org bears no responsibility with regards to these questions being used out of their intended context.
  • The Shar's ruling herein given is based specifically on the question posed and should be read in conjunction with the question.
  • AskImam.org bears no responsibility to any party who may or may not act on this answer and is being hereby exempted from loss or damage howsoever caused.
  • This answer may not be used as evidence in any Court of Law without prior written consent of AskImam.org.
  • Any or all links provided in our emails, answers and articles are restricted to the specific material being cited. Such referencing should not be taken as an endorsement of other contents of that website.
The Messenger of Allah said, "When Allah wishes good for someone, He bestows upon him the understanding of Deen."
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim]