Fatwa: # 35046
Category: Marriage (Nikah)
Country: United States
Date: 14th January 2019

Title

How do I marry the man I love?

Question

assalamu alaikum,

how can i get married to the one i love for the last 4 years? i ma a 30 years old unmarried woman and he is a 44 years old unmarried established able man. there is no reason for our marriage to not happen but strangely it is not happening even after 4 years. he and his family is not worried about his marriage it seems. but my family is very worried and i cant sleep at night thinking about my uncertain future. please help me, by suggestingsome strong dua and wazeefas.

Answer

In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

Sister in Islam,

We take note of the contents of your email and your feeling of depression.

At the outset, one should understand that it is not permissible to unnecessarily talk/chat to a Non-Mahram. It is strictly forbidden to date and enter into an illicit relationship.

Sister, we are living in this world of means. When we want something, we adopt means. Marriage is one of the most important aspects of one’s life. You should also adopt means and seek counsel from appropriate people in searching for a suitable husband.

You state you love the man for the past four years. If you loved the man, you should follow principles and means to achieve your wish.

We advise you to discuss your wish with your seniors and adopt principles to propose to the man.

Finally, Allah will decree what is best in His infinite knowledge for you.

Apart from adopting the means, the following duas are effective. Allah will put barakah in the means you adopt and guide you to the right spouse. [1]

لاَ إِلَهَ إِلاَّ أَنْتَ سُبْحَانَكَ إِنِّي كُنْتُ مِنَ الظَّالِمِينَ

Translation: ‘There is none worthy of worship except You, Glory to You; Indeed, I have been of the transgressors.

This is the supplication of Dhun-Nun (Prophet Yunus Alaihis Salaam) while he was in the belly of the whale.

Rasullullah ﷺ said:

فَإِنَّهُ لَمْ يَدْعُ بِهَا رَجُلٌ مُسْلِمٌ فِي شَيْءٍ قَطُّ إِلاَّ اسْتَجَابَ اللَّهُ لَهُ ‏"

So indeed, no Muslim man supplicates with it for anything, ever, except Allah responds to him.”

 (Jamiut-Tirmidhi)

ربي اني لما انزلت الي من خير فقير

Transliteration: “Inni Lima anzalta illayye min khairin faqeer”

Translation: “Indeed I am in need of goodness”

(Surah Al-Qasas, Verse 24)

 

This is the supplication of Moosa (Alaihis Salaam), which he read while he was a traveller and desperate for his basic needs.

"‏ اللَّهُمَّ رَبَّنَا آتِنَا فِي الدُّنْيَا حَسَنَةً، وَفِي الآخِرَةِ حَسَنَةً، وَقِنَا عَذَابَ النَّارِ ‏"‏‏

Translation: "O Allah! Give to us in the world that which is good and in the Hereafter that which is good, and save us from the torment of the Fire."

(Saheeh Al-Bukhari, Saheeh Al-Muslim)

We make dua to Allah to grant you a suitable and compatible spouse. Aameen.

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Muhammad I.V Patel

Student Darul Iftaa
Lusaka, Zambia

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.

ــــــــــ


[1]  Khawaateen Ke Masaa'il Aur Unka Hal- (Mufti Yusuf Ludhyanwi Rahimahullah)

  Mustanad Majmoo'aah Wadhaaif- (Mufti Nidhaamud Deen Shamzi Rahimahullah)

DISCLAIMER - AskImam.org questions
AskImam.org answers issues pertaining to Shar'ah. Thereafter, these questions and answers are placed for public view on www.askimam.org for educational purposes. However, many of these answers are unique to a particular scenario and cannot be taken as a basis to establish a ruling in another situation or another environment. Askimam.org bears no responsibility with regards to these questions being used out of their intended context.
  • The Shar's ruling herein given is based specifically on the question posed and should be read in conjunction with the question.
  • AskImam.org bears no responsibility to any party who may or may not act on this answer and is being hereby exempted from loss or damage howsoever caused.
  • This answer may not be used as evidence in any Court of Law without prior written consent of AskImam.org.
  • Any or all links provided in our emails, answers and articles are restricted to the specific material being cited. Such referencing should not be taken as an endorsement of other contents of that website.
The Messenger of Allah said, "When Allah wishes good for someone, He bestows upon him the understanding of Deen."
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim]