i hope your are well and may Allah(swt) reward for answering all of our questons.I have to this addicted problem of pronography.I saw the questions that you answered about pronography and i m keep trying to stop,i stop it then while after few days , i start again .Please akhie i really need help, i dont want this kind of life,i m keepin seekin forgiveness.i wan to be better muslim, please akhie help me.
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.
It is encouraging to note that you acknowledge your wrongdoing and sinful act. This is indeed the first step of self reformation (Islah al-Nafs).
The fundamental element in self reformation is courage and determination. Hadhrat Moulana Shah Hakeem Akhtar Saheb (Damat Barakatuhum) says that all that a person needs is courage and a firm resolution to abstain from sin.
Remain firm and resolute in your quest. Never give up hope. Always, keep trying. At first, refraining from sins might be extremely difficult, but after constant struggle and punishing of the Nafs, the Nafs will finally become tamed and then you will feel pleasure in refraining from sins. Insha’Allah, one day Allah (Ta’ala) will open up his treasures of Ma’rifat and Mahabbah to you. Aameen.
Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) says:
و الذين جاهدوا فينا لنهدينهم سبلنا
“And those who strive to attain our pleasure; we shall definitely guide them to our paths” (Al- Qur’an, 29: 69)
In the above verse, Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala) promises those who make an effort to gain the love of Allah (Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala). The promise of Allah (Subhanahu wa Ta’ala) will definitely come to pass, there can be no doubt about that. All that is required is that we continue striving in this path and we will surely attain the Ma’rifat of Allah (Ta’ala).
Also, consider adopting a Sheikh (spiritual mentor) who will guide you and assist you. Hadhrat Moulana Shah Hakeem Akhtar Saheb (Damat Barakatuhum) says that “When a person is sick, he will go to a doctor, when a person wishes to purchase Mango’s, he will go to the Mango Wala (Mango dealer), and similarly, one who is spiritually ill and sick will have to go to the spiritual heart specialist. Who is this person? He is referred to as the Sheikh or Murshid (spiritual guide).”
When a patient is given a prescription by the doctor, he does not question why this amount and why that color tablet and medicine. The patient knows that his cure lies in following the full treatment or prescription of the doctor. Similar is the case of the Sheikh and Murshid, the prescriptions of the Sheikh is like that of a doctor, the doses of each person varies according to his/her immune system of Taqwa, spirituality and capabilities.
We advise you to immediately undertake the following practical remedial measures to solve your addiction:
1. Restrict your internet usage to the bare minimum and only out of need and necessity.
2. Use the computer in a common place when people are around you.
3. Request some elderly person who you respect, your parents, your wife or any other person to invigilate you when you are using the internet.
4. Imagine the disgrace and shame that will overcome you if your wife, parents or teacher comes to know of the filthy act that you have done. Where would you hide your face if the entire public comes to know of the sin that you are involved in?
5. Before you sleep every night, think about death and how you will be buried in the grave with no-one to assist you and help you. Imagine Ghusl (pre-burial bathing)being done to you, you will then be enshrouded with the Kafn, people will be crying, the Janaza Salaah will be performed and then your body will be carried to the graveyard and then you will be buried in the depths of the ground. Who will be there to assist you on that day? Every day, take out some time before you go to sleep and think about death. Insha’Allah, this will remove the ghaflat (heedlessness) from your Nafs.
6. Keep yourself occupied at all times. Keep a Tasbeeh(rosary) in your pocket and whenever you have time and you are not really doing anything, take out your Tasbeeh (rosary) and make Dhikr. Remember that “An idle mind is a devils workshop”.
And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best
Student Darul Iftaa
Durban, South Africa
Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.