Fatwa: # 19716
Category: Character & Morals
Country: United States
Date: 18th January 2012


Is it allowed to give away my child to my older brother without my wife’s consent?


I am in a very strange situation at a critical time of my life. I have a one year old girl and Inshā Allah will be having another baby in January 2012. 

My elder brother doesn’t have any children yet after six years of marriage.  So my parents want this new baby to be given to my elder brother and I don’t have any problems with it. 

But wife is not agreeing to give away the baby.

So what does Shariah say about this.  As a son, am I ready to give and listen to my parents order.  Should I give without my wife’s approval or does my wife have more rights on the baby?


In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful. 

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-rahmatullāhi wa-barakātuh.

According to Shariah, the mother is the first and natural guardian of the child. [1] It is also the right of the child that he/she be taken care of by the mother.  There is no one more close to the child than the mother.  No one can serve the child as good as the mother.  Hence, to hand over the guardianship of the child to someone else is depriving the mother and the child of their first and natural right.  However, if the mother forfeits her right of guardianship over the child in favor of any person, that is her right. 

And Allah Ta’āla Knows Best

Mawlana Abdul Azeem bin Abdur Rahman,
Student Darul Iftaa

Checked and Approved by,
Mufti Ebrahim Desai.


[1]   لَمَّا ذَكَرَ ثُبُوتَ نَسَبِ الْوَلَدِ عَقِيبَ أَحْوَالِ الْمُعْتَدَّةِ ذَكَرَ مَنْ يَكُونُ عِنْدَهُ الْوَلَدُ فَتْحٌ. (قَوْلُهُ: بِفَتْحِ الْحَاءِ وَكَسْرِهَا) كَذَا فِي الْمِصْبَاحِ وَالْبَحْرِ عَنْ الْمُغْرِبِ، لَكِنْ فِي الْقَامُوسِ: حَضَنَ الصَّبِيَّ حَضْنًا وَحِضَانَةً بِالْكَسْرِ جَعَلَهُ فِي حِضْنِهِ، أَوْ رَبَّاهُ كَاحْتَضَنَهُ، ثُمَّ قَالَ: وَحَضَنَ فُلَانًا حَضْنًا وَحَضَانَةً بِفَتْحِهِمَا نَحَّاهُ عَنْهُ. (قَوْلُهُ: تَرْبِيَةُ الْوَلَدِ) هَذَا عَلَى إطْلَاقِهِ مَعْنَاهُ اللُّغَوِيُّ، أَمَّا الشَّرْعِيُّ فَهُوَ تَرْبِيَةُ الْوَلَدِ لِمَنْ لَهُ حَقُّ الْحَضَانَةِ كَمَا أَفَادَهُ الْقُهُسْتَانِيُّ. (قَوْلُهُ: تَثْبُتُ لِلْأُمِّ) ظَاهِرُهُ أَنَّ الْحَقَّ لَهَا وَقِيلَ: لِلْوَلَدِ وَسَيَأْتِي الْكَلَامُ عَلَيْهِ. مَطْلَبٌ: شُرُوطُ الْحَضَانَةِ.(رد المحتار, ج 3, ص 554: سعيد)

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