Fatwa: # 17628
Category: Character & Morals
Country: United States
Date: 3rd March 2009

Title

Alhumduliah i am a recent convert to islam. And i have many questions. Before i converted, i was in a relationship with a muslim man, i unfortantly lost my virginity to him, but...

Question

Alhumduliah i am a recent convert to islam. And i have many questions. Before i converted, i was in a relationship with a muslim man, i unfortantly lost my virginity to him, but luckily he taught me islam. After i converted i did not have intercourse with him but unfortantly did engage in oral once in which we both regreted. And because of this we have cut communication. My question as 1) am i still considered a virgin like islamically, since i have not had intercourse since i converted. 2) will i have to tell any future potential husban about my acts before islam? I'm scared to him because deep down i regret all of this and dont even want to talk about it. I really need advice, and i am too ashamed to speak to anyone about this. Is there any hadith about a woman who wasnt pure and embraced islam. 3)what should i do now? as far as asking Allah for forgivness? Please help.

Answer

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

We acknowledge receipt of your enquiries and the response follows hereunder:

Sister in Islam, it gives us pleasure to receive your question and to see how Muslim converts are interested in knowing the teachings of Islam, which Allah Ta’ala has chosen for His servants as a way of life. According to the Qur’an, a true Muslim should refer to scholars to become well acquainted with the sound image of Islam.

We congratulate you on becoming a Muslim, and we hope you understand the tolerant and latitudinarian teachings of Islam which Allah Ta’ala revealed to guide mankind.

(1) “Islam teaches us that when a person embraces Islam all of his past sins are blotted out, and as such, he/she starts with a clean slate. While his/her past sins are completely forgiven, all of his good works, however, will be carried over to Islam, and thus, he will be fully rewarded for them. This clearly shows Allah’s infinite mercy and generosity towards new Muslims.

 Allah Ta’ala states in the Holy Qur’aan:

قُلْ يَاعِبَادِي الَّذِينَ أَسْرَفُوا عَلَى أَنْفُسِهِمْ لَا تَقْنَطُوا مِنْ رَحْمَةِ اللهِ إِنَّ اللهَ يَغْفِرُ الذُّنُوبَ جَمِيعًا إِنَّهُ هُوَ الْغَفُورُ الرَّحِيمُ

“O My Servants who have wronged their souls! Do not despair of Allah’s mercy. For Allah certainly forgives all sins.” [Surah Az-Zumar: Verse 53]

The Prophet Muhammad (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam) said, “Islam wipes out all the past sins of a person.” Once a person asked the Prophet (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam), “In my past life (as a non-Muslim) I was guilty of many a trespasses and acts of lewdness; would I be forgiven?” He said, “Didn’t you know that Islam wipes out the past?”

It is recorded that 'Amr ibn Al-'Aas (Radhiyallaahu ‘anhu) once said: "When Islam had taken root in my heart I went to the Prophet Muhammad (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam) and said: 'Spread out your hand so that I may take pledge.' He thrust forward his right hand and I held it in mine (without taking the oath). He (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam) asked, 'What's the matter with you 'Amr?' I said, 'Well. I would like to make it conditional.' 'And what's the condition?' he asked. I said, 'That I be forgiven.' He (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam) said, 'Don't you know 'Amr that Islam wipes out previous sins... that hijrah wipes out previous sins... and that Hajj wipes out previous sins?' [Hadeeth in Sahih Muslim- narrated By Amr Ibn ‘Aas]

Ibn 'Abbas (Radhiyallaahu ‘anhuma) said; that some people of the pagans had committed many murders and had indulged in excessive adultery in the days of ignorance [that is prior to the appearance of the Prophet Muhammad (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam)]. They came to the Prophet Muhammad (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam) and said: 'What you offer, and call us to is quite appealing. But if you could only let us know if there is the possibility of atonement for our previous sins'. Allah, glorified be He, and then revealed the verse:

وَالَّذِينَ لاَ يَدْعُونَ مَعَ اللَّهِ إِلَـهَا ءَاخَرَ وَلاَ يَقْتُلُونَ النَّفْسَ الَّتِى حَرَّمَ اللَّهُ إِلاَّ بِالْحَقِّ وَلاَ يَزْنُونَ وَمَن يَفْعَلْ ذلِكَ يَلْقَ أَثَاماً

"(The true servants of Allah are those) who do not call upon another god with Allah, who do not slay the soul Allah has forbidden, save by right, and do not adulterate. And whosoever does that, he shall surely meet the price of sin." [Surah Al-Furqan: verse 68].

قُلْ يعِبَادِىَ الَّذِينَ أَسْرَفُواْ عَلَى أَنفُسِهِمْ لاَ تَقْنَطُواْ مِن رَّحْمَةِ اللَّهِ

Allah also revealed: "Tell them, O My slaves who have wronged their souls: 'Do not despair of Allah's mercy.'(Surah Al-Zumar: verse 53).

[Hadeeth from Sahih Muslim- Abu Dawood- Narrated by Ibn Abbas, recorded in Tafseer Ibn Katheer]

 
Now let us come to the core issue: Should you disclose your past sins to your future spouse? The answer is definitely no. Since Allah has covered a person’s sins, it is not anyone’s business to seek to lift Allah’s cover of confidentiality. Thus it is unbecoming of anyone to probe into someone’s sinful past, especially one’s life before Islam.

Islam teaches us that no matter how ugly is a person’s past before Islam, it must never be used against him and her. If anyone does that, he is forgetting the fact that a new Muslim is like a newborn. It is also worth remembering that most of the great Companions of the Prophet (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam), had highly sinful pasts, and yet, no one found faults with them for the same. Whoever intends getting marrieg to you will know you are a revert and you have a past.

After having said this, however, one must make a definite exception to the above rule. If someone is suffering from contagious diseases (such as being HIV-positive or afflicted with AIDS or other sexually transmitted diseases, etc.), it is incumbent upon him/her to disclose it to the prospective spouse [without adding details of one’s past sex life]. Failure to do so is a most heinous offense, as it may most likely expose the prospective spouse to unnecessary harm, which is not tolerated in Islam.”

(2) Yes; there are many such incidence, where women after embracing Islam took a pledgein leaving out all their sinful acts in the time of ignorance such as subsequent to the treaty of Hudaibiyyah, the believing women took pledge on the honorable on the hand of Prophet Muhammad (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam).

The qur’aan clearly admonishes that:

يأَيُّهَا النَّبِىُّ إِذَا جَآءَكَ الْمُؤْمِنَـتُ يُبَايِعْنَكَ عَلَى أَن لاَّ يُشْرِكْنَ بِاللَّهِ شَيْئاً وَلاَ يَسْرِقْنَ وَلاَ يَزْنِينَ وَلاَ يَقْتُلْنَ أَوْلْـدَهُنَّ وَلاَ يَأْتِينَ بِبُهُتَـنٍ يَفْتَرِينَهُ بَيْنَ أَيْدِيهِنَّ وَأَرْجُلِهِنَّ وَلاَ يَعْصِينَكَ فِى مَعْرُوفٍ فَبَايِعْهُنَّ وَاسْتَغْفِرْ لَهُنَّ اللَّهَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ غَفُورٌ رَّحِيمٌ

Oh Prophet! When the believing women come to you pledging to you that they will not associate anything with Allah, and that they will not steal, and that they will not commit Zina, and that they will not kill their children, and that they will not utter slander, fabricating from between their hands and their feet, and that they will not disobey you in Ma`ruf (good) [Surah Mumtahinah: verse 12 –as recorded in Tafseer ibn Katheer]

(3) "Islam also admonishes that the doors of Allah’s mercy are wide open for all sinners, provided they are willing to return to Allah in sincere repentance and respond to Allah’s call. In light of the above, we can certainly hope that the Merciful Lord forgives our sins. But one must never take the issue of repentance lightly. It is not simply saying, O Allah, forgive me. Rather, one must first feel deep remorse for the sin, refrain from all associations that led to the same, resolving never to do it again, and finally occupying oneself busy with good deeds.

Do keep in touch. If you have any other question, don't hesitate to write to us.

And Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Wassalamu Alaykum

Ml. Mohammad Ashhad bin Said

Correspondence Iftaa Student, Mauritius

 

Checked and Approved by:

 

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Darul Iftaa

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