Fatwa: # 15633
Category: Character & Morals
Country: United Arab Emirates
Date: 31st August 2007

Title

Im stuck in between my parents arguments!

Question

I would like to know if my parents are arguing over something and if my father asks me to get him something (not bad) while mother says no to it . According to the Shariah who should I obey in such a case otherwise I may end up disobeying one of them.

Answer

In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful  

Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatoh  

·        Rasulallah(صلى الله عليه و سلم  ) has stated that “the pleasure of ALLAH lies in the pleasure of your father and the displeasure of ALLAH lies in the displeasure of your father.”

 حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو حَفْصٍ عَمْرُو بْنُ عَلِىٍّ حَدَّثَنَا خَالِدُ بْنُ الْحَارِثِ حَدَّثَنَا شُعْبَةُ عَنْ يَعْلَى بْنِ عَطَاءٍ عَنْ أَبِيهِ عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ عَمْرٍو عَنِ النَّبِىِّ -صلى الله عليه وسلم- قَالَ « رِضَا الرَّبِّ فِى رِضَا الْوَالِدِ وَسَخَطُ الرَّبِّ فِى سَخَطِ الْوَالِدِ ».

(Tirmidhi Vol. 2 Pg. 11 HM Saeed)

·        It would be a fair presumption to say that if that which your father asked you to do is not a bad thing, then in fact it is a good thing. It is of utmost importance to obey the instructions of ones parents, as long as they do not instruct something that is contrary to the commandments of ALLAH.

·        In your case your father is instructing you to do something which is not contrary to the commands of ALLAH, which is perfectly within his rights as your father. However, perhaps due to an argument, your mother is instructing you not to obey your father, which is contrary to the command of ALLAH that states that one should obey ones parents as long as their instruction is not contrary to shari’a.

·        You should obey your father, and overlooking the instruction of your mother will not be considered disobedience.

And Allah knows best

 

Ml. Abdul Hameed,
Student Darul Iftaa

Checked and Approved by:

Mufti Ebrahim Desai
Darul Iftaa

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